Surviving Divorce as a Newly Single Mom

One of the last things anyone wants is a divorce. It is not something we picture on our wedding day. But unfortunately, divorce is a reality and, occasionally, necessary in bad situations. Surviving divorce can be challenging, especially if you are a mother. Redding Christian Counseling can provide the support and guidance you need to navigate this difficult time and help you heal.

Surviving divorce is just like any other major life change; it is possible with preparation. Your new life will be better than the relationship if you are willing to trust God, prepare, and move forward in boldness as the daughter of the King, God Almighty.

Tips for Surviving Divorce as a Mom

During major life changes, we can begin to question our worth. But the truth is that if you are a Christian woman, you are God’s special treasure, a co-heir with Jesus Christ for His Kingdom. There is so much more to you than a marriage that ended. Surviving divorce as a single mother is something you can do, and by letting go, God can give you so much more.

The following are tips for surviving divorce as a newly single mom. One word of advice: surround yourself with knowledgeable people when needed. You may struggle in unfamiliar areas, so ask for help from advisors. For example, if you struggle with finances, find an accountant, ask for help from the bank, or take a finance management class online.

It can feel like starting all over after a divorce. That is okay. You are stronger now than you were then and have God by your side. You can learn new things, rebuild your confidence, and tackle new goals. It all starts with taking small steps to get on track.

Get a handle on finances

The first thing to do is to get a handle on your finances. You can manage your finances whether you work outside of the home, work from home, or are a stay-at-home mom with only your husband’s income.

As a stay-at-home mother, you were probably responsible for paying the bills and grocery shopping. You know how to make funds stretch. You may need to make arrangements for extra training or to find ways to make income. You can find hundreds of ways to make money online and with side hustles.

Learn how to budget. If you have never budgeted finances, check out experts like Dave Ramsey. Living on a budget is not a constraint but instead gives you a sense of freedom. You will know exactly how much is in the bank, how much you need to live, and how much you have for fun things, like a latte from the coffee shop when you want one. No one is born knowing how to manage finances, so ask for help in this area if you struggle.

Create boundaries

After divorce, you will probably still need to interact with your ex and in-laws, especially if you co-parent. This is the time to create boundaries and insist that they honor and respect your boundaries and time. This can be challenging if you did not have boundaries in the past or people ignored them.

But this time is different. You are no longer married to your ex, nor are you required to tolerate others in the family who mistreat you. You can set boundaries about how much access these people have to you or when they can drop by your home.

Note: people who mistreated you in the past will push back regarding your new boundaries. They may say unkind things to you or about you. Stay firm and ask for help from others if you need support.

Take time out for yourself

A bad marriage can leave you drained and feeling unworthy of love. You may find that you devoted so much to your family that you forgot to care for yourself. You cannot take care of your children if you are not healthy and in a good headspace to love yourself.

Make a list of things you can do just for you. Include tasks in areas like physical health, mental health, career or training, hobbies and interests, spiritual life, entertainment, appearance, and leisure. Every day, do one task from your list. Even if you spend fifteen minutes doing something for yourself, it can boost your mood and confidence.

Next Steps: Christian Counseling in Redding, CA

Just like you will ask for help when needed for finances and chores when it comes to your mental health, do not be afraid to seek help. A Christian counselor in Redding, California can help you navigate divorce in the weeks and months following as you set out as an independent woman raising a family. Your counselor in Redding will combine proven psychological methods with faith-based principles to draw you closer to your relationship with Jesus and build a solid foundation as a single mother.

If you are looking for a counselor in Redding, California who understands surviving divorce, the new family dynamic, mental stress, and obstacles, call our center to schedule a session. At Redding Christian Counseling in California, we would love to connect you with a counselor to help you move forward.