The Book of Common Prayer is used by millions all over the world. Many who attend a liturgical church (liturgical just means ritual or tradition) recite a prayer of confession that goes like this:

Most merciful God, we confess that we have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed, by what we have done, and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you with our whole heart; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves. We are truly sorry and we humbly repent. For the sake of your Son Jesus Christ, have mercy on us and forgive us; that we may delight in your will, and walk in your ways, to the glory of your Name. Amen.

We ask the Lord to forgive us and then we get personal about it. In many churches, this prayer is followed by a time of silence for each person to confess their sins to God.

Within this prayer is a structure for forgiveness and repentance that we see reflected in the Bible. There are a lot of verses we can turn to regarding forgiveness. But what about personal repentance?

The Lord Removes Our Sins

Psalm 103:10–12 says, “He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.” (ESV)

The Lord promises to forget our sins. He promises to not hold what we have done wrong against us. It is easy to look at something like Psalm 103 and forget (or overlook) that we have a part to play in this situation. Before the Lord can remove our sin “as far as the east is from the west,” we must repent.

First John 1:9 spells out what we must do. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (ESV)

Repentance is not a popular word in our society today. Personal responsibility/accountability is becoming less and less respected. We are expected to skirt responsibility, blame others, or give excuses. Even when people “apologize,” they often do not take responsibility for their actions. Their veiled apologies are accusations against someone else holding them accountable.

But that is not how it works with God. Bible verses on forgiveness and repentance require that we acknowledge what we did without excuse or blame.

God Wants Our Hearts

Sometimes to repent, we need to listen to how our actions or words affected someone else. This can be challenging at a time when we carelessly speak 280 characters into the void and pretend there are no consequences.

Some arrogantly promote those who “say it like it is,” as if being cavalier with other people’s emotions or the impact of our words is a good thing.

Jesus told the religious leaders to check their arrogance, for out of the heart the mouth speaks (see Matthew 12:33-37). He told them to be careful with their words, for it would all come back again on judgment day.

Our flippant words might seem like no big deal to us, but God is paying attention. Imagine being in the center of a room and having all your tweets and social media posts read back to you. Are you okay with what you’ve posted?

Repentance is hard. It involves more than our words. It involves our hearts. In Luke, Jesus says, “The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” (6:45, ESV). The root of our flippant words, our cavalier attitudes, and our indifference is our heart. And that is what God is truly after.

Repenting to Each Other

Repentance is a two-process. We seek forgiveness from those we have hurt (if we can), and then we go before the Lord.

It takes a huge dose of humility to approach someone else to apologize. It is hard to look someone in the eye and ask forgiveness for our careless words or our actions. But it is what God requires.

Repentance is not a get-out-jail-free card. We cannot be cavalier with our actions or another person’s reaction. A flat, “sorry,” will not suffice. The prayer above states, “We are truly sorry and we humbly repent.”

This is not a flippant, “I’m sorry you got offended by my words.” Which is, to be clear, not an apology. This is, “I apologize for my words yesterday. I was mad and took it out on you. I am sorry. Please forgive me.” See the difference?

While the Bible does not give a five-step plan for repenting, it does say that we must take accountability for our actions. So get specific: what exactly did you do? No excuses. Once we start justifying our actions, we are no longer apologizing. We are responsible for every word, action, text, and post. So, take responsibility. “I did this, and I apologize.”

Repenting to God

Over and over verses in the Bible remind us that the Lord knows our hearts. He knows our inner thoughts and our deepest desires. He knows our unspoken jealousies and our true intentions. He knows when we act from a vengeful or angry heart. For there to be a true cleansing of our sins, we must come clean before our God.

Bible verses around forgiveness and repentance reveal that God takes this seriously. He values the call to repent. It is a requirement in our walk with God. No one is sinless. We do a dozen things daily that we need to repent to God for.

It can be a simple prayer, “Lord forgive me for my anger.”

If the behavior is habitual, it might require more time on our knees. “Lord, forgive me and show me the root of what this is.”

Sometimes we can see our sin and yet not know how to change. How do we stop hating someone or stop reacting in anger? How do we let go of our resentment or pain? We are not meant to do things alone. Our counselors are here if you need someone to talk to. We would love to help you identify what is going on so you can seek repentance, and peace, around what is going on. Call us today.

Ultimately, we repent for “what we have done, and what we have left undone.” That means we repent for walking away, for not lending a hand when we could, and for turning a blind eye to those hurting around us. We repent for using others to feel better about ourselves, for passing blame, and for not loving our neighbors as ourselves.

Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy. –Proverbs 28:13, NIV

God does not was us walking around thinking we are horrible people. God has nothing to do with guilt or shame. But He does value personal accountability. And if we want to lean fully into the promises in the Bible to remove our sin from His memory, then we must lean into what God’s Word says about repentance.

God does not intend for us to change ourselves. Ultimately, we cannot. God works through us, from our hearts out, to bring about lasting change. But we must start by honestly repenting and seeking forgiveness for what we have said and done. God is with us. Our counselors are here if you need someone to journey with. God never said we must do this alone. Prayer from Book of Common Prayer (https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Book_of_Common_Prayer_(ECUSA)/The_Holy_Eucharist/A_Penitential_Order:_Rite_Two)

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